1) Make sure you promise an unreasonable deadline you think the client wants, and then deliver late. Over-promise and under-deliver. Nice!
2) Take the tiniest germ of humor you can find and squeeze a cartoon out of it by writing an excessively long caption to explain why this is so funny. Brevity is wit my arse.
3) Ask for other cartoonists’ markets and contacts. Nothing endears you to a professional more than asking to see their books.
4) Argue print vs. web and refuse to consider other points of view. You know you’re right – make sure we all know it too.
5) Beg for criticism, and then explain why it’s wrong. Classy!
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