Another Comic Strip Remake

Yesterday I pondered why the remake craze has never found it’s way into the comics. Today’s candidate…

Launched in 1964 and renamed Norbert in 1973, George Fett’s animal strip was popular in Australia and Japan until its end in 1983. Characters included Sniffy and his love interest Queenie, Little No-No the orphaned pup and Clyde the cat.

I say we take animals from other popular strips, take a cue from Hollywood, and switch just enough around to avoid any legal entanglements. Sniffy loves lasagna, Clyde sleeps on top of a hooded litter-box, and Little No-No works as an evil HR Director. Make Queenie a little yellow bird and you’ve got comic gold!

Comic Strip Remakes

It seems the entertainment industry in general can’t come up with any original ideas anymore. Movies based on TV shows… TV shows based on movies… Movies based on TV shows based on Bazooka Joe comics… Yeesh! So why hasn’t this trend hit the funnies pages yet?

Well, normally, something being remade has been off the air/out of theaters for twenty years or so, and since many strips are still chugging along decades after the original creators shuffled off their mortal coils, there’s not such a wealth of stagnant material to pull from.

Still, there’s a good amount of stuff out there, and so, for the next few days, I’ll be “re-imagining” a few older strips for modern audiences. Let’s start with…

Bill Holman’s punny fireman ran Sundays from 1935-1973 and brought into being catchphrases including “Foo,” “1506 nix-nix” and “Notary Sojac.” Other characters included Chief Cash U. Nutt, Spooky the firehouse cat and Smokey’s wife Cookie.

I’d like to remold Smokey into more of an NYPD Blue with firemen. I see Smokey as a fireman so gritty and urban he won’t even play by his own rules. Instead of his trademark “Foo!” I’d suggest “F.U.!” Have Chief Nutt lighting fires and sleeping with Cookie and I think you could really have something!

“Constantine” – Review

Before The Matrix (and after The Matrix Reloaded) my movie mantra was simple — no Keanu Reeves.

But, because I know you all depend on me for the straight dope re: comic book films, I subjected myself to Constantine. (The reviewer has asked for donations in lieu of flowers.)

Rachel Weisz plays a detective searching for the reason behind her twin sister’s apparent suicide. Reeves’ character shows up, visits her sister in Hell, drowns the detective, and tries to figure out why he’s been attacked by an anthropomorphic swarm of insects.

If this thing were mashed potatoes, it’d include The Exorcist, Hellboy and some Grade C film noir spuds mixed so long that they become gluey and inedible.

There’s a lot of ominous whispering and nervous glancing, but not much else. The one plot twist is so obviously foreshadowed that by the end its really a plot turn of no more than three (+/- 2) degrees. I did however enjoy many of the scenes’ compositions, but neat camera angles can only get you so far.

I’ve never read the source material (although by default it must be better than the movie), and I don’t think I’ll be getting around to it soon. As for future Reeves comic book films, you guys are on your own.

(This film rated a YHGTBKM rating of 3-1/3 Margie heads and numerous utterings of “Ick!”.)